To remember

👉 Some conflicts are normal and part of everyday life, while others are more profound and concern fundamental values.

👉 It is essential to express your needs clearly, listen to the other person's needs, and seek a compromise.

👉 Violence is never acceptable. A trusted adult can help you if you are in an unhealthy situation.

Types of conflicts

Normal conflict

Normal conflicts are part of daily life. You can disagree with another person, you might both get mad, but nothing between you is destroyed. You don’t start to doubt your feelings or your relationship and you’re both open to discussing the problem. Take the time to calm down and try to identify each person’s responsibility. Then, express your emotions and search for a solution together. With a little effort, you’ll manage to resolve the conflict.

Conflict of values

In a conflict of values, two people disagree about fundamental issues, such as fidelity, family, friends, trust, or respect. Sometimes it isn’t possible to reach an agreement. If you’re in this kind of conflict, take a break and assess the situation. To continue the relationship, you’ll need to make some major adjustments. One of you will probably have to compromise on his/her own needs to satisfy the other person.

Major conflict

If you’re experiencing a serious conflict that threatens your safety, well-being, or balance, talk about it right away to an adult you trust. If your relationship makes you scared, guilty, or anxious, that means it’s unhealthy for you. Violence is never acceptable, and jealousy, dependency, and control aren’t signs of love!

Conflicts are a matter of different needs in a relationship

When two people in a relationship have different needs, it can create tensions. You might prefer to spend time with your friends, while your partner needs to spend a lot of time with you. It doesn’t mean you don’t love each other! Take the time to express your needs and feelings. Then try to find solutions together that take both people’s needs into account. If each of you does your share, you’ll surely manage to find a balance. Learn how to resolve a conflict.